APR 10, 2020 – With another surreal week behind us, I wish we could each find time and space just to sit and have a good cry. It releases all the feel-good endorphins that lift our spirits and calm us down when we have a deep, cleansing, soothing cry.

We’ve all been on overload, overwhelmed by the knowns and unknowns. Each with a different stress threshold, some people freak at the thought of running out of TP, while the most selfless among us somehow have the grace to intubate infected patients just inches away. Rather than remaining in frantic small business survival mode, I’ve been making a conscious attempt to stop and really feel my feelings, letting stress-releasing tears fall where they may. We all have so many losses to mourn — from our former way of life to more than 16,000 fellow American lives.

It was a week ago tonight that loss was felt very close to home: One of the dearest dogs in the world somehow made her way out and was found dead in the street.

For a dozen years, Miss Josephine Barker gave comfort and joy to me and many others, with a heart way too big for her sweet 7-lb frame. In the past month, she spent most days napping with or in the lap of her best buddy, 96-year-old friend and neighbor, Hannlis, serenely sheltering in place. Josephine’s passing was like the pandemic in that it blindsided us, a blow massive, violent and tragic. It was support from understanding friends and family and boat loads of tears that got me to this accepting place. I share this not to put more sadness on your radar, but to pass along a message that has been amazingly soothing to me.

It’s from psychologist Claudia De Angelis, a wise friend in Argentina who uses forms of meditation and hypnosis to help her patients deal with emotional pain. Claudia emailed, “I can imagine the huge hurt your heart feels, along with the gratitude for the times you shared. All those lovely thoughts are ones you can feel deeply in your chest when meditating. She will always be there when you need her. Just close your eyes, breathe profoundly, and go with her to the beach, walk and smile, cry and laugh. She always will be by your side. I’m absolutely convinced that we can share moments with our beloved,” Claudia wrote, “if we can create a new language to share. That magic of pure energy will allow you to always feel her there.”

What a gift that was to read. Wondering if it would be helpful to you, and not just pertain to my sense of loss alone, I shared Claudia’s message with our graphic designer, Brandon, who said, “Oh, it was wonderful for me … I would love to be states away with my parents right now, but I can’t. This helped me imagine being right there with them, together, caring for each other and doing the things that we love.” I hope the same is true for you, Cardies, whether it’s feeling the hugs of your favorite people, enjoying the pleasure of traveling again, or getting a good workout at the gym.

After reading Claudia’s message, another kind email popped in from prolific Contributing Cardie and now also dear friend, Mary Morini. Knowing we’d just lost Josephine, Mary forwarded this from gratefulness.org, a site I know she values greatly; the quote from Patricia Campbell Carlson said it all, “Grief and gratitude are kindred souls, each pointing to the beauty of what is transient and given to us by grace.” Please take care of yourself and those you treasure most.

jodee stevens
founder & chief creative